What is Real Love?

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. Love never fails. —I Corinthians


This piece of poetry describes the exact characteristics of real love. These qualities can be found in all truly loving relationships. The problem is actually with trying to search “love” in our daily lives. It is often found that most of us don’t look for these characteristics in a person. Instead, we look at physical appearance, wealth and fame. These are not the qualities of true love.

                                                         What is real love?

          Real love could be said to extend beyond mere infatuation or crush which individuals develop at some point in time. It is a concept which encompasses the feeling of 'infatuation' and requires a higher degree of understanding and application!

A few things could be said to define a loose definition for real love although it may vary from one individual to another.

It is about the right person


Real love could be said to be about finding the right person. In other words, falling in love may not be real love. For your likes and dislikes may not align with your 'other half'. As a result, one could say that real love is finding the right person in which case there is a kind of equilibrium between the two individuals.



Knowing the other person

Real love requires a good and thorough understanding of the opposite person you are getting involved with. This is a tad different from the 'falling in love' and getting carried away. Such feelings diffuse after a while and it boils to the compatibility aspect between two individuals.

Knowing about the person's personality and character are so important. To identify the characteristics you could look at the aspects which draw you to a guy or a girl. If the list is long then you know that you know a lot about him /her and if the list is short then probably you need to know the person a bit more! This aspect would surface a quintessential one with regard to the sustenance of relationship. So if you were to get into a relationship with someone, it is always better to know him better!

Real Love isn't sex



It would be fair to say that sex is a part of the whole experience called 'real love'. But to identify sex as a determinant would be a miscalculation as this aspect is momentary in nature. As time goes by, this aspect too would lose steam and what would remain is the foundation- that of understanding and appreciating each other's emotions.



Love is a commitment.



Although feelings will accompany love, and although sex will be a part of marriage, a lasting, you cannot base a healthy relationship on these things. In the long and winding journey of life, infatuation, sex and other such details will slowly vaporize and all that would be left in the relationship is commitment and understanding between the partners.



There are several other factors which could go into the definition of 'real love' but then again they would vary from person to person!

Love Before Marriage

Love before marriage is a fruit which is ripening. It needs to be nurtured properly so that it ripens in the best manner possible. All the same, there are chances of its being exposed to a few dangers too but then chances are that these things help it to become a better fruit.




Love before marriage has many features which make it unique, some of them are:

You are still single:

Before marriage, even though you are into a relationship, you are still single. You need to fend for yourself emotionally and physically! Your partner may be around you to comfort and spend time but you perceive the world as a single. Although you slowly begin to get into a mindset of a married person, you are still not there completely.

Change in lifestyle:

Before marriage, a person is his /her own self. He/ she does not change the way of living because the institution of marriage has no binding on the individual. In other words, the person is a free bird, free to act according to his/her will and to do what he /she feels is in the best of his/her interest.

Decision making:

Decision making is entirely a one person's job although you might be dating seriously. This means that even the smallest of decisions would be taken by you and you would hold the reins completely of what is good and bad for you.

The other side of this issue is the impact of your decision making does not have an impact on your partner for you are not into a relationship as yet.

Pamper yourself:

Before marriage you have the distinction of pampering yourself by doing things which you like the most. This could be wearing your favorite set of clothes or hanging out at your favorite restaurant. You do care for your partner with whom you are into a relationship but that element of sharing does not exist.

Commitment:

The degree of commitment is also less before marriage. One could say that pre marriage is the period that people are into the process of committing themselves to their partner's interests. That apart, you still answerable to yourself for your actions and deeds and no one else is involved in the picture. These decisions could vary from your personal to your professional sphere. The commitments one has also do not undergo a great deal of change and remain more or less confined to the interests of the individual as against after marriage.

Physical intimacy:

Intimacy does exist but you do not share a part of your self emotionally and physically with another person. Generally people are in the process of getting this act together before marriage.

Tips to Fall in Love

Tips to Fall in Love :-

Falling in love according to many people is an involuntary experience. But even to experience this experience you need a few things up your sleeve to make it work! Some of the things which could help you realize this experience are:


Be Yourself

Half the battle's won if you follow this! One could say that this is the primary requirement to experience love. No matter what masquerade you put it won't help you in the long run. The sooner you be your real self the better for you, for it is that trait which an individual would look for to fall in love.

"Being you" is what usually gets a women's attention initially anyway so don't forget that. It is things such as natural conversation, coincidences etc. which help people find them their partners. And natural conversations won't be possible if you are not your true self. The things we like about are partners can often be traced to incidents or conversations when we first met them.

A well defined agenda

Knowing your purpose behind getting into a relationship would not only be the "key" to your success but must also be "evident" to her. Chances of a positive response would be heightened if the opposite person gets a clear picture of your intentions. And in the process he /she could give their heart to you! Your agenda must be clear and with no games or "hidden agenda". You must be an individual with a plan once you are sure about the compatibility aspect!


There are several ways to go about a plan such as

You could invite the person to functions with co-workers and relatives. When you introduce your partner to people who are close or important to you, you would induce a sense of inclusion and belonging.

You could get her some gifts are in some stuff in jewellery. If you spend your hard earned money on something you picked out for him/her because of admiration, then the partner might accept it without a fight!

Engage into conversation that develops the emotional quotient gradually

Clear communication

The foundation to any relationship is a clear cut communication. And this heightened in the case of love for even the smallest of misunderstandings can cause ripples in people's life.

You need to pay heed to the right moments to initiate a conversation or a feedback to ascertain the finer aspects which would help you graduate to the next level. Remember, to keep a balance and pick your battles well, because losing your identity in her completely will allow her to walk all over you and she wont respect that either.

Show play your cards carefully and also be explicit at the same time for it is through conversations as these that you could decide on the future of your relationship.

Sex in Love Marriage

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Sex in Love Marriage

Sex in love marriages are special for it is reminiscent of not only the physical intimacy shared by the couple but the entire experience of coming to together, from falling in love to marriage. 

It has been discovered by Italian scientists that the biochemical state of falling in love is similar to obsessive compulsive disorder. The yearning of couples to be together and learn about each other in intimate detail is overwhelming. They tend to grab every opportunity to show affection and get as close as possible to one another. During this period sex can be very exciting.






Difference between casual sex and sex in love


There's still some of the mystery of casual sex and also some risk.






The difference is that sex is more mutual when we've fallen in love.


In a love marriage, sex is more than mere physical intimacy.


It's about giving and sharing ourselves physically and emotionally. As well as sexual satisfaction, we can expect to feel emotional fulfillment


Sex in a relationship after love has its own set of positives such as gaining knowledge about the opposite partner. It also helps develop a mutual sense of trust between the partners. Individuals feel more open to try different means to spice up their sexual desires. This would not be possible if the distances are not narrowed between them which could happen only when they trust each other!


Casual sex has its own set of advantages and disadvantages. There is a certain sense of risk and mystery involved in it. Individuals barely have any knowledge and understanding of each other and their respective background and what they seek is an urge to satiate their sexual hunger


There is a certain sense of urgency and the focus is primarily on physical satisfaction of desires. The experience is mechanical in nature and does not involve any love making aspects. Individuals look to get done with the act of making love in a haste and instead of prolonging it and understanding the partner Sex in a relationship which sprouts from love offers an opportunity to the individuals to grow together and become great lovers. It may not be possible to recapture the mystery of casual sex but there's a much higher chance of all-round fulfillment.


When a relationship matures, sex matures. You now have the advantage of knowing each other well. Fear of rejection is replaced with trust and security. This allows you to move into a stage of experimentation and mutual growth. You can take the time to fine-tune your skills as a lover.